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Post by Fat Boy on Dec 16, 2009 6:31:56 GMT -7
i have a situation that I'm not sure how to handle.
this will be one of my longest post , but i need you to know the whole story, so sorry.
our local troop has handed out the kits for the derby that will be mid Feb.
i don't have any boys but for the past 4 years i have offered up some help for what i feel is someone who either needs it or asked for it. and have had the last 4 winning cars built out of my shop.
there only a few rules that i tell my dads when they come over.
#1 there are no guarantees !!
#2 the boy needs to do as much of the work as he can !
#3 i will only help for one year and then you are on your own.
last year had 4 boys run through here and all were in the final 4 for the champion ship.
heres my issue :
1 of the boys is fine young man ,this year he is 2nd grade, his mother just dropped off the kit to my wife last year and asked my wife to ask me if i could build his car, my first response was no unless the dad and lad came over and did the work right ?
well my wife tells me a horrible story about how the boy lost his dad to a terrible car accident just 5 months earlier and the mom just didn't know what to do as he was very excited to race.
so what i did was throw his block in "the block" drill some holes.
cut him out a simple wedge style, sanded it up and put a coat of primer on and gave it back to him to paint it. took some old BSA axles i had and put a simple polish on and i had some stock wheels that i put a simple prep on, weighted with lead. he painted it , i assembled it and tuned it up as fast as i could get it.
well the car was pretty fast and it ended up 2nd. and you could tell that it was a glorious day for the young man !!
well yesterday the same thing happens, she just dropped the car off to my wife and asked the question. she has just gone through an open heart surgery and cant even drive her boy to school, so here i am with this boys car and will have to go against all my rules to build this car.
don't know what i should do
suggestions from my friends please
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Post by Fat Daddy on Dec 16, 2009 6:39:03 GMT -7
Tell her you will help, but you'll only help. The boy has to come over and do the work to make his car go fast! She isnt doing him any favors by having you build his car for him. It's understandable that people have issues, believe me, my family has plenty, but the boy needs to learn that hard work wins, not knowing the right guy. I know you'll do what's right for the boy!
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Post by psycaz on Dec 16, 2009 7:00:15 GMT -7
I'll second the idea that if you have the time, offer to work with the boy yourself.
If everything in his life is as you are being told, it might do him some good to just be able to do something and take his mind off things at home.
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Post by ACME Racing on Dec 16, 2009 7:05:58 GMT -7
I agree with FD. Just tell her to drop the kid off so you can teach him. Sounds like he needs someone to look up to. Plus you like building cars. Win - win situation.
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Post by W Racing on Dec 16, 2009 7:41:09 GMT -7
We have this every year. Thy need help. It sounds like she can not even drive?  have the scoutmaster arrange a ride so the boy can work with you... |
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Post by darktowerracing on Dec 16, 2009 8:27:08 GMT -7
Take bids to see who wants the help the most. The 4 highest bidders get to take the first 4 spots. That'll get the young squints off yer back! I have a few buddies from over at DerbyTalk that will build them fer ya if you don't want to mess with it.
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Post by Fat Boy on Dec 16, 2009 8:28:53 GMT -7
Take bids to see who wants the help the most. The 4 highest bidders get to take the first 4 spots. That'll get the young squints off yer back! I have a few buddies from over at DerbyTalk that will build them fer ya if you don't want to mess with it. dont be a jacka$$ |
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Post by W Racing on Dec 16, 2009 8:41:33 GMT -7
Take bids to see who wants the help the most. The 4 highest bidders get to take the first 4 spots. That'll get the young squints off yer back! I have a few buddies from over at DerbyTalk that will build them fer ya if you don't want to mess with it. What is your username over at derbytalk?  |
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Post by NinjaRabbi on Dec 16, 2009 9:42:04 GMT -7
Fatboy,
Sounds like you have an awesome heart! What we are trying to do is to let the kids who come over do everything except cut ou the shape of the car. They can but the block in the Block, drill the axle holes (I usually mark them), sand, paint, polish the wheels, polish the axles.
So, depending on how much time you have, he could do a bunch.
Way to put yourself out there to create good memories for someone who needs some, especially around the holidays when it is toughest for people who have lost loved ones.
Blessings,
Jim
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Post by birel33 on Dec 16, 2009 13:26:27 GMT -7
I tip my hat to you for opening your door to the boys, I do the same. Most people do not take me up on my offer then complain later that some how we have cheated. I imagine it is the same most places.
I do not think I would be very willing to help this young man on one hand as it sounds like the mother wants to take advantage of you. Then on the other hand you may be the one positive person this young man will have to look up to. I know what I would do in this position. If the mother could drop off the kit to your wife, then she should be able to come with the child and spend the time with him while he learns about the building of the car. If she is unwilling to come and bring him and stay there while you help him build his car, then I would have to say no.
I will explain my reasoning. If she is willing to take advantage of you, she might be willing to do anything. She might claim her son was hurt in your home or worse. Do not leave yourself open to this type of senario. She somehow found a way to get the kit to your wife, she can find a way to your home. Hope this helps. I have faced this and my rule is if a parent is not willing to come over with the child then I am unable to help.
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Post by resophonic1 on Dec 16, 2009 13:38:29 GMT -7
Take bids to see who wants the help the most. The 4 highest bidders get to take the first 4 spots. That'll get the young squints off yer back! I have a few buddies from over at DerbyTalk that will build them fer ya if you don't want to mess with it. What is your username over at derbytalk? I believe that it would be TROLL |
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Post by Teamfreeroller on Dec 16, 2009 14:05:20 GMT -7
fatboy. there are a lot kids in BSA and they all want to win.but alot of these kids come from single parent homes.and alot of them there grandmother has to do it.so i offer to help them ONLY if no dad to help them. it gets out of hand sometime but it is worth it to see these kids win there first race and the smile on there face. BUT no one can make that call but you . think about it and follow your heart and it will work out.
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Post by speedie4u on Dec 16, 2009 14:25:21 GMT -7
I think if it was me, i would likely call her and talk to her on the phone and set up a time for both of them to come over or you go over there with some tools or ect.
I think this is the time for mom and son to also come together. even if she is just watching.
But to me, some brush paints, would allow mom and son to paint the car together.
She might feel inside, thats its awkward for her to do more than just drop it off. Or perhaps its her way of handling things.
Either way, I would call or go over there and set up a time, that all can get together and work on the car.
Sporty
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Post by Evans Family Racing on Dec 17, 2009 4:48:58 GMT -7
fat boy life is not cut and dry like most of us would like it. i say follow evolutions, speedie4u and ninja rabbi's recommendations in that order, remember evolutions experience and background. for your families sake. after that i would suggest you talk to scoutmaster to find answers to any of your questions and maybe tell you who his pal in pack is and see if he and his dad would also help. offer to go with someone else (den leader and their son) to boys house and give help to all sort of a mini clinic. take tools to their house. and as i do with my son make him do more work then he did last year. teach em how to fish.
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Post by Fat Boy on Dec 17, 2009 6:08:14 GMT -7
thanks for the advice gents !!!
you have helped me decide whats best.
i beleive i will try first to see who is his buddy and invite them,
or ask the mom to bring him over.
thanks again
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